20 Ways To Be Annoying

1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. If you have glasses, repeatedly take them on and off during a conversation in order to emphasize your point.
4. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
5. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
6. Practice making fax and modem noises.
7. Highlight irrelevant information in technical papers and "cc" them to your boss.
8. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
9. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
10. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
11. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
12. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
13. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
14. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
15. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
16. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
17. Ask people what gender they are.
18. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
19. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
20. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."